58 Days of Selfcare

Over a year ago I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. It was a condition that I knew very little about. After speaking with my doctor and doing my own research, I learned that it is. “a common and chronic disorder characterized by widespread pain, diffuse tenderness, and a number of other symptoms.” So what the hell does all this really mean and how does it affect me and my daily life? Well imagine going to bed at 9:30 pm then waking back up at 1 am, then again at 3 am, then again when your alarm goes off at 6:00 am and feeling like you didn’t sleep all night. What about getting sick and it taking you a month to recover for something as small as a cold? Better yet, imagine going to bed at 9:30 pm and waking up the next morning feeling like you went to a Crossfit class and everyone decided to throw their kettlebells at you as if you were target practice. Then, you wake up feeling like an arsonist invaded your body and set your muscles on fire. That’s how fibromyalgia makes me feel.

I went through periods of people not being able to even touch my shoulder. My body had become so tender that I’d cringe when I was poked in the arm. Even after my wedding, I fell sick, my muscles ached, and I was out of commission for 3 weeks. That was how I lived for about 9 months until I found some relief through some amazing, all natural vitamins. They made me feel as though the clouds had parted and the hot ass sun was beaming its beautiful rays on me. There are medications out there that are recommended for treating fibromyalgia. What I found out was that according to my own doctor and others I have spoken with, those medications cause more harm than good, especially when it comes to your mental health so I never tried them. So I spent those 9 months pushing through the pain and trying to find what worked for me and man was it tough for not only me but those around me.

58 Days ago I set out on a journey to become a ‘better’ me. It wasn’t something I announced to anyone, not even my husband. It was something I held myself to quietly because I didn’t want to feel pressure from anyone. I figured since I got these vitamins in my system helping me manage way better than I ever though I could why not take the next step. I take care of myself normally but I’ve always known I could do better. In the past 58 days, I’ve developed better eating habits and make it a point to exercise every day even if it’s only for 5 minutes. Allotting enough time to stretch multiple times per day was also something I’ve learned to do. I’ve found the more active I stay, the less pain I’m in. I’ve also learned to limit my intake on foods that cause inflammation. Now, don’t get me wrong. I still have my days where I’m tired, in pain, and fighting to loosen up my tight muscles. I can also still tear up some Oreos while getting crumbs all over my chest and in my bra but I’ve been practicing moderation. I know what I take aren’t “miracle pills” but they help make life easier.

Blogging on The Curvy Coalition and working on my business, Bea’s Corner Designs have also helped me to become a better me in 58 days. Having these outlets allow me as sense of ‘normalcy’. I’ve gotten a chance to interact with so many of you in ways that I hadn’t expected to. I’ve been able to provide humor to many by being authentically me. The me that I had thought I lost in those 9 months of pain to where I confined myself to being in the house because I didn’t want to be a buzz kill around others. This sounds corny, but many of you have helped me get through these last 58 days, even those of you that I’ve called assholes and all kinds of other names. I’m back to getting out and I’m looking forward to getting out more this summer.

Anyways, I’ve posted pictures that I’ve taken from day 1 up to day 58. You may not see much progress but to me, I see so much growth and improvement in myself. Until next time…..


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