“You’re too Unhealthy and Overweight to get pregnant right now”

A few months ago I hurt my knee while jogging on the track. Being the stubborn woman I am, I ignored the pain for months. I chalked it up and told myself, “whatever it’ll heal on its own.” A few falls, pain, and constant knee pops later, I went to see a doctor because the pain became dibilitating.    I’m Bianca, don’t be like me. 

Anyway, I went to the doctor. 12 sessions of Physical therapy, Orthopedic surgeon visits, $48:83?£749 in deductibles and copays, and an MRI later, I started feeling better. The interesting part about all of this, not one doctor I saw said anything about my weight being an issue. Why? Well maybe it’s because they know me. Know me well enough to know I eat pretty good, stay fairly active, and Know my history.

Let’s get one thing straight. I didn’t just wake up one morning, stood up in the mirror and saw I became fat overnight. I’ve been heavy ALL of my life. I was a fat baby, a fat toddler, a fat teen, fat before, during, and after lapband surgery (post to come on that soon), and I was fat when I was pregnant with my daughter. Guess what? I’m still fat! I get it from my dads side. So when my new Obgyn had the almighty nerve to open her booksmart with no bedside manner mouth and tell me, “You’re too unhealthy and overweight to think about getting pregnant in the next year. I think you should spend the year focusing on losing weight.” I had to do a double take. 

I wasn’t upset that she addressed my weight, I know I’m fat. I’ve been chubby all my life and learned to love myself many years ago when people used to go out of their way to fatshame me. I was livid because to her, my healthcare professional, the one who isn’t doing me a solid and seeing me for free, the one who I had to pay a copay to see and have to wait for the bill to come in and pay the damn deductible, I was just another number on the scale. Not once did she ask, “well what are your eating habits?” Or “what’s your activity level like?” Not even a, “I see you lost 15 pounds since you were last here almost two months ago to see your PCP.” She just made a ridiculous assumption that I was “unhealthy”.

 I come to you with this story as I continue to shove green beans down my throat while typing up this blog post because that’s what dinner at my house typically consist of. Maybe after this I’ll go lift some weights and do my nightly yoga and stretches because that’s the normal thing that a this “unhealthy” woman does almost every night.

With the exception of fibromyalgia I have no other health issues. It’s actually pretty funny how whenever I go see a doctor they are always shocked to discover I’m nowhere near diabetic, hypertensive, and have normal cholesterol levels.There is this predisposition that if you’re fat, you’re unhealthy. What’s interesting is that I can outrun most of my “skinny” friends in a race. So for her to make her assumption that I was “unhealthy” based on a number on a scale was pretty ignorant of her.

Needless to say, time to find a new doctor. 

Btw, the situation with this doctor is handled.

Have you had a similar experience? Share below! 


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